That Dorky Homemade Look

That Dorky Homemade Look

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AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ Fed up with feeling like you can't meet the standards of the Quilt Police? Do you want to quilt for comfort and pleasure -- and not to win some high-falutin' quilting contest? Weary of worrying about what others will think of your color choices -- or your pieced points? Or your applique stitches? That Dorky Homemade Look: Quilting Lessons from a Parallel Universe is the quilting companion you've been wishing for.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ Lisa Boyer, a popular columnist for Quilting Today magazine, gives you permission to quilt because you love it. She clears your path of all those merciless judgments pronounced by the Quilting Queens. She invites you to make quilts that are full of life. This funny book offers these nine principles for the 20 million quilters in America:AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 1. Pretty fabric is not acceptable. Go right back to the quilt shop and exchange it for something you feel sorry for.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 2. Realize that patterns and templates are only someone's opinion and should be loosely translated. Personally, I've never thought much of a person who could only make a triangle with three sides.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 3. When choosing a color plan for your quilt, keep in mind that the colors will fade after a hundred years or so. This being the case, you will need to start with really bright colors.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 4. You should plan on cutting off about half your triangle or star points. Any more than that is showing off.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 5. If you are doing applique, remember that bigger is dorkier. Flowers should be huge. Animals should possess really big eyes.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 6. Throw away your seam ripper and repeat after me: qOops. Oh, no one will notice.qAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 7. Plan on running out of border fabric when you are three-quarters of the way finished. Complete the remaining border with something else you have a lot of, preferably in an unrelated color family.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 8. You should be able to quilt equally well in all directions. I had to really work on this one. It was difficult to make my forward stitching look as bad as my backward stitching, but closing my eyes helped.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ 9. When you have put your last stitch in the binding, you are still only half finished. Your quilt must now undergo a thorough conditioning. Give it to someone you love dearlyA‘to drag around the house, wrap up in, spill something on, and wash and dry until it is properly lumpy.AŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠAŠ qNo reason not to have quiltmaking be a pleasureq, says Lisa Boyer, who has as firm a grip on her sense of humor as she does on her quilting needles. qIf we didn't make Dorky Homemade quilts, all the quilts in the world would end up in the Beautiful Quilt Museum, untouched and intact. Quilts would just be something to look at. We would forget that quilts are lovable, touchable, shreddable, squeezable, chewable, and huggable -- made to wrap up in when the world seems to be falling down around us.qAfter he stopped laughing at it, the sewing machine repair dude broke the news to me that there was no earthly way he could ... I found a local sewing machine repair shop and swaggered in, my thumbs tucked in my belt loops, a well-placed anbsp;...

Title:That Dorky Homemade Look
Author:Lisa Boyer
Publisher:Skyhorse Publishing, Inc. - 2015-01-27


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